Wow, it's been a long day or two. The computer has been tied up since we've been working on the program for the funeral on Monday. Jenni tells me I can't say "funeral" anymore, so since the "f" word is off limits now, we call it Monday instead. I'm actually going to be putting together a video to commemorate Dave's life so even if you can't make it to the service on Monday, I'll post it on youtube so you can still see it.

I had to have a tough conversation with Jenni's boss today. I don't think he understands what having a death in the family does to a person. He was wanting Jenni to come back to work tomorrow. I told him it was out of the question. I feel bad for the guy because Jenni was, for all intensive purposes, the backbone of his company. When you remove the backbone, you're about as hopeless as a guy without a spine. I really hope the guy's business doesn't go under, but it's not looking too good. Jenni will go back this upcoming Wednesday to train another girl to take her spot.

Jenni and I got to go to her brother-in-law's softball game. It was interesting, although I had more fun watching the odd expressions Jenni's baby niece was giving us. We had a really good talk on the way home about the process of grief. It's interesting how the emotions have a similar way of dealing with grief as the body does dealing with physical pain. If the body sustains too much damage it will go into shock so that it won't be hit with the full wait of the pain that would be equal to the damage done. For instance, a guy who steps on a land mine won't feel much pain right after he steps on it because the body can't handle that much pain all at once. I've found the emotions to be very much the same. When someone is dealt too much emotional pain all at once, they go into a state of denial or they reject the information as false so that it doesn't completely break them.

I believe Jenni's healing process is going well because she is taking the correct doses of pain in amounts that she can personally handle. They come in waves and I know that her tears are slowly healing the wound in her heart. I know it will be a slow process but in order for the wound to heal properly, it takes the correct amount of time. It can't be rushed or skipped or short-cutted. It just has to be dealt with little by little.

As I write this, I hear Jenni crying in the other room. She is with one of her good girlfriends, and she is getting part of her heart healed. It breaks my heart to hear her cry, but I know it's necessary for her to be whole again.