Today I woke up at 1:30 and cleaned.

This has been something that has been put off and has been sorely needed. I cleaned the living room. I cleaned the kitchen. I cleaned my bedroom. After all of this I sat down and still had about half an hour before work.

I felt a tugging on my heart. A small persistent nudging that I have ignored lately. I then opened my Bible for the first time in a while. I opened up to James and began to read. God showed himself to be very real to me in this scripture because the three main issues that have been weighing on my heart lately, were all spoken about in this first chapter. I thought to myself, do I believe that God is real? Yes. Then I thought, do I believe that the Bible is completely true and the inspired Word of God? Yes. Then I thought, then why in the world would I doubt the promises that God gives in scripture? If I believe that the Bible is true, then every single line that is written is completely 100% true. This helped to do away with any doubt, and as I read, God changed my heart. It showed in how I acted tonight at work. It showed in my lack of frustration. It showed in my desire to share Christ with Chasity.

After work, I went over to Chasity's house to watch a movie. She already had a buzz from drinking and I followed her over to her house. Through slurred syllables she tried to once again convince me that she was a good person, which was more an attempt to convince herself. Under those glazed eyes, I could see that the alcohol was another failed attempt for happiness; another dead-end for fulfillment. We ended up not finishing the movie we started, because we talked about her need for the gospel. I told her that she lacked meaning and true fulfillment in her life, and that all the things that she was trying to find happiness in, were futile. We talked about her need for Jesus, and we talked about her past and how she has come to the place she is now. We ended our conversation a little before 5 in morning when she had to go pick up her daughter from the babysitter down the street. As I was leaving, she said that she was going to come into work the next night and she wanted to talk about it more. I know she sees her need.

I just hope that she will be able to let go of her unbelief and run headlong into Christ's waiting arms.

Please save her God.