Do have any idea how much I love the Big Red? Do you also happen to know how stupid I can be?

Well tonight, against my better judgment (I'm really not sure If I have better judgment) I did something stupid, for a free Big Red. I'd like to think of Anthony as my sugar daddy. He allows me to do ridiculously stupid things and then if I do it, he rewards me with a Big Red the next time we go out Ale House. My first test was drinking a buttery glass of shrimp scampi juice (mostly melted butter, cooking oil and minced garlic). Tonight�s stupidity was my greatest accomplishment yet.

I am a dishwasher at Chi-Omega, and seeing that I love the Big Red, and that I don't have any money, and that I'm ridiculously stupid and I will just about sell my body for a free Big Red, I ate the mixed assortment of food that was washed off people's plates out of the dishwasher drain. It filled a Styrofoam plate and I ate it in handful increments. I could taste broccoli at times and sometimes bits of ham, dishwater, cheese, and some other things that I couldn't really distinguish the taste of. Even though it was soaked in water, it was probably pretty healthy. I'm pretty sure there was some lettuce in there.

I think I shall call it not the Chef salad but the Dishwasher Salad. It's about time the dishwasher got some recognition.