If you ever get a spare moment and you think you want to see Star Wars: Episode II, try and find a book you are already reading, or if you aren't reading a book right now, find one. After you have found a book, completely forget about any thoughts or desires you had towards going to see Star Wars. Take the $5 you would have spent on the movie, and spend it on something else. Do anything with it...who cares. If you can't think of anything good to spend it on, here are a couple of suggestions that would be a better use of your money:

1) Roll it up and smoke it, or
2) Give it to an alcoholic bum

...but whatever you do, under no circumstances should you spend it on movie tickets for Star Wars: Episode II. If anything, wait for it to come out on DVD and watch it on mute. This way you will be able miss out on some of the bad acting and horrible dialogue, although be advised that you still will be made to see Anakin Skywalker make the same grimace or "look" that he uses in many different scenes. He busts it out when he is angry, when he is sad, when he is in love, and especially when he is trying to convince his friends that he is the devil.

Be prepared to squirm uncomortably every time there is a bit of bad dialogue, or when there is some bad acting, or God forbid these two things happen at the same time. Every time this happens (which is quite often), it is enough to make a grown man cry, lose control of his bodily functions, lose his lunch and go insane...all at the same time. The little teenage boys with high pitched voices and bad acne who are responsible for cleaning the theatre don't like it too much when this happens, so please, stay home. If not for yourself, do it for the cleaning boys.

I went and saw it for the second time today. I enjoyed it the first time, because I didn't listen much to the dialogue. Well I did this time and ruined the illusion of the movie I had going on in my mind. Maybe I'm exaggerating a little about how bad it is. You'll just have to ask one of the other unfortunates who saw it. Oh and don't let them say, "well, it's Star Wars! It has to be good." That one has already been used with Episode I.

So Insomnia was pretty good Jason? I think I'll see that next time.